Ariel Winter Not Paying the Help

Every time a celebrity slams a shameful story about themselves we need to take a shot. We'll die in three minutes but at least we had fun. Ariel Winter is clapping back at the h8ers (another linguistics home run of the 21st century) who claim she gives her boyfriend Levi... read more

Zayn Malik Seems Uniquely Reasonable

Nobody likes the TSA junior detective kit set up at airports. Even terrorists seeking an eternal heaven can't abide a two hour wait to go bare feet with strangers. Though everybody begrudgingly agrees they don't want to end up on the slamming into a hi-rise end of an... read more

Miley Cyrus Proves Worth

Miley Cyrus took to Instagram to prove that she's fuckable in a new picture. The singer can be seen sucking down her day's worth of calories in a red bikini alongside two of her captives. The beginning-of-summer bikini selfie is as quintessential to a celebrity as sweaty... read more

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Rebecca Burger Whipped Creamed to Death

Even the attractive social media fitness models among us will die some day. You can only hope the French chicks with nice asses splashed with bidet water will linger longer than the rest. read more

Corinne Olympios' Boyfriend Also Investigating

Corinne Olympios' boyfriend, Jordan Gielchinsky, has issued a qualified unqualified statement of support for the woman he calls his long time friend and girlfriend. read more

Courtney Cox Not Transitioning To Bruce Jenner

Courtney Cox proudly proclaims in something called New Beauty Magazine that her face is back to normal after years of playing pincushion with various doctors. read more

Chrissy Teigen Still Talking About Her Womb

The rate of infertility issues among female social media celebrities is roughly one-hundred percent. Reproduction related issues are the last topical refuge of women with nothing else to talk about. read more

Miley Cyrus Offers Wise Advice

Miley Cyrus wants her little sister Noah be a breakout music star without feeling a need to react to constant online criticisms. Who needs to hear, hey, you can't sing a lick, or hey, you look like Billy Ray's high school yearbook photo with even deeper jowls. read more

Clooney and Cindy Crawford's Husband Tequila Rich

George Clooney and the only other 50-something guy he could find in Hollywood almost as handsome as himself, former male model Rande Gerber, cashed out on their Casamigos Tequila company to the tune of one billion dollars. read more

Emmy Rossum Bikini Shamed and Bill Cosby Skates on the Last Men on Earth Podcast #90

On this week's  Last Men on Earth podcast , we delve into the new female subjugation of bikini shaming, millionaires receiving inequitable pay, Taylor Swift's vagina having the power to heal, Bill Cosby experiencing blind luck, Elizabeth Banks making shit up because why... read more

Ashley Graham Inspires Herself To Tears (VIDEO)

Ashley Graham stars in a new YouTube video where she inspires the shit out of various insecure women. The grab bag of test subjects are paraded out onto a photo shoot where they greet Jesus disguised as a plus sized model. read more

Lucy Hale Fat Shames Herself

Lucy Hale violated the politically proper designation of persons beautiful in every way including the severely overweight way by fat shaming herself in a casual manner on Instagram. The not yet thirty year old TV actress posted a Father's Day throwback pic of herself with... read more