Kim Kardashian Reveals Someone Else Is Pregnant With Her Baby

The Kardashians are doing everything short of going door to door with free DASH swag to woo people into watching their shit show Keeping Up With The Kardashians after last season's poor ratings. While Kris Jenner's fetus three-ring circus has been going on for over a week... read more

Eva Mendes Reaches For Relevance With Guilty Working Mom Comments

 Last time I checked it was only Ryan Gosling starring in La La Land. Now it seems Eva Mendes is there too with the revamped plot focusing on her non existent hectic work schedule.  read more

Emily Ratajkowski Cleavage for Days and Shit Around the Web

  Full moon selfies, streaming skin, and more! read more

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Megyn Kelly Kicking Ass And Taking Dumps

Megyn Kelly is making a name for herself as the spunky morning talk show host who gathers up her Jones New York dresses, squats down, and takes massive steaming Megyn Kelly dumps on her guests. The former Fox News correspondent and perpetual owner of a... read more

Lena Dunham Victim Of Fertility Industrial Complex For Kylie Jenner

Lena Dunham revealed on Twitter that her friends all have busted vaginas, which isn't too surprising considering I assume all her friends had their lady parts replaced with Coexist bumper stickers to protest the thing during the thing. The most feminist Ziggy impersonator... read more

Open Post: Kardashians Recreate Intro Ten Years Later, And How Is Kris Jenner Not In Jail?

If turning your kids into an army of factory reject Bratz Dolls - with the exception of one spherical psychopath with an affinity for A-list sex worker Blac Chyna - isn't child abuse, the laws need a tune-up. The difference between the original intro to Keeping Up With... read more

The Revenge Of Crystal

Crystal Workman whored out her daughter Ariel Winter when she was a child, and is now shocked and dismayed that her child turned out to be a whore. Crystal might not be very smart. Surprising for someone named Crystal. Winter recently elaborated on her emancipation from... read more

Britney Spears Solo Kohl's Fashion Show At Home

Britney Spears might not be invited to mingle with the who's who of drug addicts at fashion week events happening around the world, but that isn't stopping her from putting on a manic dead-eyed fashion show of her own on Instagram. In a new video, the lip syncing... read more

Lady Gaga Gets Touched

Former pop star Lady Gaga is still hoing out her Netflix documentary, Gaga: Five Foot Two, with a sense of self-importance that should be reserved for whoever cures cancer or Lena Dunham when she finally learns what to wear for her body type. A fumigation tarp. Younger... read more

Lifelike Bella Hadid Defends Female Pap Against Her Own Bodyguard (VIDEO)

Balla Hadid must have gotten a Japanese sex robot upgrade recently, because she displayed remarkably humanoid characteristics while defending a member of the paparazzi against her own bodyguard. Science. Wild stuff. The supermodel sensation was leaving the Michael Kors... read more

Aaron Carter Shares HIV Test Results On Television

Carter was apparently shocked when he realized he was looking into a mirror and not watching a deleted scene from The Walking Dead deemed too gruesome for basic cable. Instead of going to the hospital to deal with that mess, he booked the only show that would have him.... read more

Jonathan Rhys Meyers' Wife Shares Insta Dead Unborn Child

Social Media should have never made its way into the hands of people who have owned a CD or known communication outside of emojis. As it stands, Facebook is inundated with funky fifteen-minute pecan pie recipes for the holidays and Oscar-worthy odes to rescue dogs... read more