Open Post: Time To Play Who's The Next Hollywood Sexual Assailant

This fall is all about sexual assault in Hollywood, and the question on everyone's mind - or at least the minds of everyone in my office this morning during a rousing conversation - is "Who's the next Hollywood sexual assailant to be outed?" Said in a game show host... read more

Danica Roem Is First Openly Transgender U.S. Elected Official

Thirteen-term Republican Virginia Delegate Robert G. Marshall's dream of only being surrounded by penises in public restrooms as far as the eye can see is now officially dashed thanks to his loss to transgender victor in the 2017 Virginia elections, Danica Roem. Marshall... read more

Catwoman Beats Boyfriend, Boyfriend Beats Cat Right Back

Domestic violence that goes both ways is a clear sign that love will last. Everyone needs a hug after a black eye. Even if that hug is coming from the same partner who gave you the shiner.  read more

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Fox News Anchor: Texas Victims Lucky Jesus Watched Them Bleed Out

Jesus sees you when you're sleeping and he knows when you're awake, and he knows where to witness you getting gunned down by a psychopath in a church in Texas. While covering the devastating Sutherland Springs, Texas massacre that left twenty-six dead and twenty injured,... read more

Britney Spears Painting Auctioned For $10,000 To Guy Who Was Auctioning It

Britney Spears gave the art world the wake-up call it desperately needed when she painted a breathtaking field of flowers as it would appear on a sheet of stickers. The original video of Spears creating her mentally incapacitated fantasy is what really needs to be... read more

Payton Manning Testicle And Anus Troubles, Again

Football's golden boy and down syndrome success story Peyton Manning may be known for how he once handled the ball on the field while working towards his Heisman or leading the Colts to the Super Bowl, but it's what he does off the field with balls that really has people... read more

Claire Foy's Knee Survives Adam Sandler Attack

Claire Foy is such a prim and proper English rose that she makes Kate Winslet look like a bag of Katie Price's douche juice. Instead of slamming the h8ers with clever hashtags and tearful but defiant Snapchat videos after getting knee molested by former comedian Adam... read more

Corey Feldman Wants Cash to Expose Pedos (VIDEO)

    Who wouldn't donate to a IndieGoGo campaign to expose all of Hollywood's nasty pedophile producers, agents, directors, managers, and best boys?  read more

Chrissy Teigen And Her Nipple Part One Thousand

Chrissy Teigen's nipples have lost some of their razzle and dazzle over the past few years, and now the former model is being forced to turn cheap tricks in order to get them back in the spotlight. If Teigen goes ten minutes without seeing her cellulite, tits, or searing... read more

Pole Dance Is Officially A Sport, Olympic Contending Strippers Coming Soon

For once women can finally take pride in pole dancing instead of it only being celebrated in the privacy of sketchy clubs. That woman with the C-section scars struggling to feed her five kids was always an athlete read more

O.J. Simpson Living High and Banging Ho's (VIDEO)

If you ever needed a reminder that it's better to be rich and famous than not be a violent psychopath, witness the reaction to O.J. Simpson, released into the wild earlier this month after nine years in the pen. read more

Two Idiots Reference Babies To Shill Makeup

Ninety-percent of the time I'm able to write about the Jenndashian brothel without hearing any of the girls actually speak, but in order to supposedly hear Kylie Jenner and Beast spill the hot gos on their pregnancies, I sat through this video of the two makeup-smeared... read more