Ashley Graham Crackers Chesticles and Shit Around the Web

Celebs show their girl power, Netflix nipples, and more! read more

Brad Pitt Didn’t Back Down When Weinstein Encroached On Gwyneth Paltrow

When you’re known for giving people pikey poundings on screen, threatening elite sexual favor seekers with a Missouri whooping off screen isn’t too far behind. Brad Pitt saves the day again. read more

Gwyneth Paltrow Warns People Not To Fuck With Her

One thing you can say abut Gwyneth Paltrow, she's got moxie. Or that other word for moxie, conceited. She does not lack confidence. read more

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Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop Busted Again for Unproven Claims

According to Gwyneth Paltrow, her Goop site and its highly questionable healthcare and lifestyle products are being persecuted because the townsfolk with pitchforks and torches simply aren't ready for leading edge thinking.  read more

NASA Blasts Gwyneth Paltrow, Though Not Into Space

Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop site for women not yet under financial conservatorships is pushing $120 stickers placed on the arm designed to "rebalance the energy frequency in our bodies.” Like a tuning fork to restore the body to optimal electronic frequency. read more

Gwyneth Paltrow Is Out

After a fifteen year run of increasingly unpopular movie roles in films not opposite Robert Downey Jr. in an iron battle suit, Gwyneth Paltrow is calling it quits on acting. She's hinted that maybe she'll be working onscreen here and there, but don't get your hopes up, if... read more

Gwyneth Paltrow the Gathering

Gwyneth Paltrow took a big steaming Goop on eager attendees as her first annual "In Goop Heath Summit" in Los Angeles this weekend. Nobody even flinched at the use of cheap puns for clearly serious medical seminars. read more

Gwyneth Paltrow 'Successful And Attractive' For Edit

UV victim Gwyneth Paltrow shares her harrowing experiences with fortune and fame in the latest issue of The Edit. The sixty-four-year-old isn't apologizing for the fact that most of the world wants to stuff her full of rose quartz vagina stones and throw her into a river.... read more

The Gwyneth Paltrow Guide to Anal Sex

If you've been waiting to stick your dick into somebody's ass until Gwyneth Paltrow told you how, prepare to unleash the beast. Through her website Goop, which helps rich women ease the burden of excessive disposable income, Paltrow's second annual sex issue is upon the... read more

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Gwyneth Paltrow Surrounded By Hacks

Gwyneth Paltrow's website Goop appears to have become a common online gathering area for people who nobody likes. When you're never invited to dinner or out for a drink or to otherwise leave your McMansion you gravitate towards buying eighty dollar tubs of skin cream. read more

Gwyneth Paltrow Entering Self Parody Zone

Mocking Gwyneth Paltrow means finding those moments when she's not even trying to be horrible but the bitch leaks out. It's invariably those times when Paltrow struggles to relate to the common woman and flubs. read more

Gwyneth Paltrow Finally Getting It

Gwyneth Paltrow appears to be coming to the realization that people hate her because she's a pompous elitist cunt who sells fifteen thousand dollar dildos. When you come from a family of means and have some social status, people pretend to like you even though they want... read more