Cindy Crawford Turns Out Her Kids and Taylor Swift Heroic Survivor on the Last Men on Earth Podcast #97

On this week's Last Men on Earth podcast, Matt and I and special guest Jessica Winther explore various depths of human depravity including ESPN's self-immolating slave auction, Cindy Crawford auctioning her white kids, reports that porn is killing erections in young men,... read more

Taylor Swift Sexual Assault Merit Badge

Taylor Swift prevailed in her case against the Denver radio DJ who goosed her ass during a post-show photo op four years ago. The wheels of patriarchal injustice grind slowly.  read more

Swift's Mom "Vomit And Cry At The Same Time"

Taylor Swift's mom, Mrs. Childpimp Moneybags, broke down in court while testifying against her daughter's sexual assailant David Mueller. The DJ has a thing for seven-foot-tall country trash bags of bones, and he played grab ass with Taylor's golf ball butt cheeks during... read more

Taylor Swift Comes Out of Hiding With Cringe-Worthy Westbrook Congrats (VIDEO)

Taylor Swift has been in hiding since earlier this year. Some say she's locked down in her candy factory after too much public attention nearly ruined her chocolate. Others suggest long term esthetician treatments and slapping her boyfriend's hand away from her adorable... read more

The Upside of Fucking Taylor Swift

Among the incontrovertible lessons learned through the eons is that men have no standards when it comes to fucking. When somebody tells you their dog is picky about what he eats, let that pooch skip a few meals and watch that canine rummage through his own shit for... read more

Taylor Swift Is Tip Top Bitch

Katy Perry is nuts in the news with her new album release. Not everybody is happy. For instance, anybody with musical taste. Also Taylor Swift who takes her industry feuds as dead serious as Suge Knight. Only she doesn't like to touch people. read more

Katy Perry Hates Taylor Swift

Pop music star battles are the encephalitic younger cousins of rap star battles. Just smile and hand it that balloon it keeps staring at. read more

Taylor Swift Disguised To Fuck This New Boyfriend

Taylor Swift has been in hiding for the past few months, fueling speculations that she's actually a slice of plain white bread in a wig that needs to be periodically swapped out due to mold. The charismatic starch has actually been porking younger British piece, the... read more

Women Turn on Taylor Swift Who Will Pretend to Give a Fuck

Women who spent this past weekend belting out their gynecological bona fides have started attacking the posers who didn't show up to march. It's only a matter of time before women turn on each other. You can't abort cattiness. read more

Taylor Swift Shows Off Little Round Ta-Tas And Shit Around The Web

Taylor Swift hits the town in a tight tank top at the gym. By hitting the town, that would be seven seconds from private car service to the backdoor of the gym with private bodyguard running interference. read more

Taylor Swift Charms 96 Year Old Male Fan

Today in fake news, Taylor Swift performed a heavily documented private concert for the friends and family of a 96 year old WWII veteran named Cyrus Porter who is supposedly her "biggest fan." read more

John Mayer Lamely Disses Taylor Swift

John Mayer just threw major shade at Taylor Swift! If you were to read that obnoxiously sensational headline you might think he said she had a huge vagina or that she actually has no friends, the latter actually being true. read more